Spark returned the Rocket Radar, which was still malfunctioning after Blanche’s adjustments. Blanche was obviously not amused by the adventures of a fellow team leader, but realized his use of the prototype provided additional insights into what could be causing the malfunction.
Welcome! I'll say that it's ok to be confused and for your identity to be coloured in as you explore gender and what suits you. Realising you're not a part of the binary and breaking from that is incredibly affirming but it also leaves you floating in space a bit as everything up until that point has been so rigidly defined. Just give yourself the freedom and time to find yourself within it.1. What are your pronouns?
He/him for now, not sure I feel I need to change this I could go with anything but I'm male by birth and present as such
2. How do you like to describe your gender / identity? Are there any terms, identities, or affinities you like to evoke in describing yourself?
Non-binary works, although I probably have a slight male slant
3. In your experience, does being non-binary feel like having no gender, many genders, fluctuating genders, or both / neither?
None, I feel my personality is fairly divorced from masculinity or femininity for the most part, with some flourishes of both
4. What's your favorite thing about being non-binary? What's your least favorite? What's something that has surprised you?
See question 6
5. Has any people, media, art, music, etc. inspired your non-binary self-actualization? If so please share & feel free to elaborate!
Probably David Bowie to an extent
6. Is there anything else you'd like to share or say?
This is the first time I'm even acknowledging this to anyone other than myself because I really don't even know how to bring this up to anyone right now. I came out publicly as bisexual years ago and realized asexual was more in-line with what I felt, coming out with that to a few friends. Being non-binary is another one of those things I can look back to my past self and easily see how my personality and interests weren't very connected with most definitions of masculinity/femininity. I was socially anxious and spent some middle school and most of my high school years trying to fit in with other boys - trying to adopt more masculine interests and mannerisms. I never really fit in, and eventually realized that trying to force these things on myself was stupid and caused a lot of depression. It's only within the past year I started thinking more about being non-binary because I've grown to a point in my life where I'm more comfortable with who I am and examining that sort of thing, but I still have that "how do I really know" sort of thing going on so yea.
So I guess I'm at a point of "what now" with this, how to approach close friends/family, what this will mean romantically (I'm not aromantic and I have also never been in a relationship), and I'm just not ready to talk to anyone I know about it (although part of me would like to cannonball this shit like I did with the bisexual coming out) so I'm posting here and feel free to say a thing to a sort of confused person ok thanks for reading!
Oof, you have my sympathies. I grew up in the Evangelical community, that is very familiar. I am glad to hear they are at least somewhat accommodating for you.Oh yeah, I experienced this in spades. I even got, "I hope this phase ends eventually" from my father. That was maybe two years now? Lol. They've also given up on talking about it.
In fact, that was perhaps the most extreme for them, cause now anything else I do that deviates from gender norms goes unnoticed, e.g., my hair, my nails, conservative use of makeup. I haven't really pushed much further though.
I don't disagree, but in my friend's case, it really comes from a place of bigotry. He's a conservative evangelical, and has made disparaging comments about queer folks in the past. He's toned it down since he learned his brother is bi, and since his views have put him at odds with the rest of our group. But I know his attitude hasn't changed, he's simply doing what he must in order to remain peaceable.
Compared to other recent gender related threads, that Blanche thread is surprisingly tame. I was mentally preparing myself for worse.Sad but unsurprising that some gamers™ are feeling some type of way over Blanche being non-binary. Now claiming developers said they were a woman at SDCC. Which, y’know, is a load of nonsense as you’d expect.
Even the gaming-side thread here has a good helping of ‘grasping at straws’:
https://pokemongolive.com/en/post/willowreport-loomingshadow/ Date: 10/26/19 Subject: [Willow Report] The first of many cliffhangers We had our first encounter with a Team GO Rocket Team Leader today. Testing needed to be done on the Rocket Radar prototype. Blanche has been an integral part...www.resetera.com
Not at all - you’re right, though I’ll bite my tongue at being grateful for the few there. I’m sure it not having gained much traction is a contributing factor.
It's almost like they are playing life like it's a game where trans and enby people aren't allowed even a small win.Not at all - you’re right, though I’ll bite my tongue at being grateful for the few there. I’m sure it not having gained much traction is a contributing factor.
It’s mainly that they’ve only ever used their name or they/them pronouns to refer to Blanche yet people throw out non-binary as being clutching at straws which inherently assumes a binary as the sensible default. Seems wilfully ignorant to not understand the context of the two other leaders having been referred to as he/him and she/her while specifically only using Blanche’s name or they/them pronouns.
People have meltdowns if anything trans or non-binary is presented loud and proud in a game and then when it’s landed as normal and unremarkable in-universe it’s suddenly back to ‘clutching at straws’.
First of all: don't worry. This is a big mood tbh. You're not alone here, I can confirm that myself, with a couple of minor details changed. (I *do* have my pronouns as he/him and they/them in places, but I still go back and forth over what I want people to call me. Maybe this is a little gender fluidy for me personally? Idk)I'm just gonna ramble for a bit. This might be steam of consciousness...
It feels like every time I start to feel comfortable about my identity I start doubting myself. Like first I go back and forth on whether I feel right calling myself non-binary because I don't feel any dysphoria or any real desire to present differently. Then I start fretting over my pronouns because I like they/them on characters and such, and seeing it makes me feel good so why don't I just be he/they? Then I feel like maybe I'm just they/them and I'm making up excuses to cling to he/him because it's so convenient to use and I'd only have to come out to people I want to, which is complicated by the fact that I really don't want to be openly non-binary in public, and right now he/him feels like my armor that lets me feel like I can fit in and still be true to myself.
I used to think of myself as being in between male and agender on the spectrum, but I'm sick of trying to place myself on a spectrum. I'm sick of thinking about what my gender identity is. I'm sick of fretting about my pronouns. I don't even want a gender anymore. Maybe that makes me agender but I don't care. I only want to think of myself as just me. I don't even want to set non-binary on my profile on here. The only reason non-binary feels right to me is because it feels like an umbrella. Is this what it feels like for people who say to use any pronoun with them? All I really know is that she/her isn't me, and I don't want to care about anything else. I can just say he and they are both fine and I don't care which.
Nice nails, I'm glad you're finding some time to explore things you want to do.
Thanks for the compliments!Nice nails, I'm glad you're finding some time to explore things you want to do.
As for the thread, this bonfire:
Obama on 'Call-out culture' - "The world is messy. There are ambiguities. People who do really good stuff have flaws."Here's the video clip itself, transcript below. This idea of purity and you're never compromised and you're politically woke, and all that stuff — you should get over that quickly. The world is messy. There are ambiguities. People who do really good stuff have flaws. People who you are fighting...www.resetera.com
Thanks for sharing. Not surprising that we’re an afterthought for tech companies.Sup y’all. Friday tomorrow
New research from University of Colorado Boulder indicates that popular facial analysis services including Amazon, Clarifai, IBM, and Microsoft misclassify individuals who do not identify with the traditional gender binary.www.forbes.com
Definitely left in the wake of whatever dream surveillance tool they come up with. Terrifying the situations it could suddenly thrust you into if it has a hiccup.
Could just stop talking about and tripping up over non-binary people and not invite people that don’t think we exist onto Contrapoints. Doesn’t seem that difficult and though I empathise with the bombardment she’s faced directly I find it hard to buy this “damned if I do, damned if I don’t” act when the latter hasn’t actually been attempted.
I wish her no ill-will but can’t personally support her in what she’s going for anymore. The few stumbles before were irritating but you know, there’s a lot of pressure and she’s growing etc. Then Buck Angel happened and it was shitty, and now most of this. The “oh dear, poor Buck” segment? Effectively the first half? Nah lol. I’m good.
Don’t moan about the extremes when you appeal to them either. He’s not a supervillain, he’s an asshole that thinks people like me shouldn’t exist. He doesn’t need to be anything more than that to warrant the reaction he gets.
It’s a good thread, will post here for others.
It’s total revisionist bullshit and it’s far from the first time she’s tried to push it.
Useful image to post when future inevitable examples happen on gaming side.
Holy fuck I'm gonna cry, I hadn't seen that dialogue from Yakuza, that's fucking amazing.Quoting this from the Persona 5 homophobia thread, just because I had no idea that the Yakuza games were so progressive on this, and it shows the "Japan is just socially different and that's just how it is" excuses are just that. Stupid insensitive bullshit excuses.
Useful image to post when future inevitable examples happen on gaming side.
This is legitimately great to see, thank you for sharing it. As you say, blows a hole in the "but Japan" argument. I've not actually played a Yakuza game yet so this might be a great place to start.Quoting this from the Persona 5 homophobia thread, just because I had no idea that the Yakuza games were so progressive on this, and it shows the "Japan is just socially different and that's just how it is" excuses are just that. Stupid insensitive bullshit excuses.
Useful image to post when future inevitable examples happen on gaming side.
Just another point about Yakuza, Nagoshi (head of the series, Chief Creative Offer for SEGA) is close friends with a transgender TV hostess/media personality and they host a stream about every month where they talk about SEGA's upcoming stuff and also bring on famous directors or comedians and musicians to talk about their stuff. Basically, they're not afraid to let transgender folk be part of the official face of the company. And also this:
The problems the series has had regarding transphobia are mainly found in Yakuza 3 and 4, and they've been actively getting better in that regard ever since. The main problem that the series has had and in some ways continues to have is strangely enough, the issue of a large focus on machismo. Male characters make up 90% of the cast of almost ALL Yakuza games and while the protagonists are always painted as these paragons of virtue, all other characters tend to treat women quite poorly (the villains in particular).I *have* heard that Yakuza 0 still isn't perfect, but even from the outside (I need to play 0 too lol) you can still see a clear progression over the past few games of actively getting better, culminating in the above in...I think it's Kiwami 2? And removing a bad sidequest tm in the Yakuza 3 remaster. There's a lot to be said for devs who actually trying?
Certainly doing better than Atlus at least. Atlus more like BADLUS
This is some really neat additional context thank you. Do you know the name of the media personality or that stream at all? Would like to check it out as that's a really cool thing for a large games company to be doing over there.Just another point about Yakuza, Nagoshi (head of the series, Chief Creative Offer for SEGA) is close friends with a transgender TV hostess/media personality and they host a stream about every month where they talk about SEGA's upcoming stuff and also bring on famous directors or comedians and musicians to talk about their stuff. Basically, they're not afraid to let transgender folk be part of the official face of the company. And also this:
Signed on Thursday, the new laws require that youth organizations implement a policy that protects transgender or gender non-binary children from bullying and discrimination. City properties are also now required to provide a gender-neutral bathroom in all of their facilities.
This is her:
This is all really great, thank you. So nice to hear of representation plus points over there.This is her:
I don't remember where the stream happens (It's in Japanese and I think it's a niconico stream? Been months since I last tuned in) but yeah, it's been a thing for quite a fair amount of time. And I only JUST remembered that she is the same person who plays the transgender character in that image that I was responding to lol.
I remember that she's also been a host/MC for various companies' panels at the annual Tokyo Game Show too so it's not just SEGA that she's worked with.
This is great! Please let us know how it goes.
Remember, it's not your job to correct them. You've put in the work and then some. If they're not going to listen, that's on them. What you've already done is amazing and appreciated.
Losing stamina with this. Spend time patiently writing paragraphs to three people coming at us to police our upset, manage to turn their opinions and they apologise. But then the same thing happens the next page, and the next one, and the next one. For every single thread. Because the mods can’t even be fucked to do something like sticky a thread highlighting a problem even they acknowledge within it. Someone from outside the community that’s seen it enough times to go “uh, what the fuck?” and reach out to trans people for their feedback.
That posts saying trans people are being “too sensitive” about transphobic jokes are just given a slap on the wrist and even the most obvious “lol cancel culture” troll is given nothing to dissuade others from coming in and rewording the same one-line take that boils down to “you’re being too loud”.
Fuck is the actual point in posting in those threads anymore?
They’re derailed from page 2 and the rest of them is spent combatting the same arguments.
It's alright! I think you expressed the frustration most of us have hereedit: On reflection..
Not going to feel guilty about being irritated for the stuff that goes on and level that against myself. I'll keep the pan lid on a bit better but there's only so much steam that can build up before some needs to burst out to bring it back down.